Remember that scene in Zootopia when Judy arrives in the big city for the first time? Anyone with small kids knows exactly what I’m talking about, but let me explain for anyone who enjoys some variety in their television and isn’t held captive to the same animated movies over and over and over and over again 😉. Judy is a small rabbit from a small town who has a dream to become a cop in the big city of Zootopia. She’s confident, eager, and excited to go to the city to fulfill her dream and when she arrives on the train, she’s wide-eyed, curious, enthusiastic, and eager to experience all the things city life has to offer. This was me once I got through my first month or two of sobriety and I started to realize there was this whole WORLD of enlightenment that I didn’t even know existed. I felt like a ravenous animal, desperate to fill myself with as much knowledge as possible, and as quickly as possible. As I immersed myself in this world, I quickly realized there is SO much information, that it was actually very overwhelming. It took lots of trial and error. I read some books that I put down a quarter of the way through and never picked back up. I started some podcasts and realized the host annoyed the shit out of me and it wasn’t worth my time if I was spending the entire episode rolling my eyes at them. I followed and then un-followed lots of accounts if things they posted didn’t jive with me or made me feel worse about myself. It’s super important for everyone to do this exercise on their own and it’s a constant work in progress, but I thought I would share some of “Allyson’s Favorite Things” as some inspiration. I hope you’ll love most of it, but if you don’t, that’s okay too! My goal here is to provide a starting point for anyone in that beginning phase of transformation or self-discovery who is wide-eyed with all the possibilities and looking for a friendly face to provide them with a little map of personal recommendations.

Quotes and Ideas that Hit Home

• “It’s Not Hard, It’s Just New” – Doing anything for the first time, especially as an adult, is fucking hard. Really hard. Especially if you’re not immediately good at it, which 99% of the time you won’t be if it’s new. I am a perfectionist with an “all or nothing” mentality so my first instinct if I try something new and am not immediately an expert at it, is to retreat. “Nope, not for me.” This quote “it’s not hard, it’s just new” is something I have repeated to myself on a very regular basis when I am up against something that seems really hard, and I am trying to fight my instinct to retreat. This could apply to a new workout you may be trying; a new curveball or project you get assigned at work that you’ve never had experience with; a new hobby you’re experimenting with; a new relationship you’re exploring. Trying new things is intimidating, sometimes embarrassing, and really hard, but it’s also how we change and grow. If we never try anything new, we will always stay in the same place. I encourage you to step outside of your comfort zone, try something new, and when those fight-or-flight instincts kick in, repeat this quote to yourself to convince yourself to stay and fight. When I first started working out at 9Round, it was new and it was HARD, and I wanted to quit. Instead, I kept telling myself “this isn’t hard, it’s just new,” and eventually it became easier and easier (not the workout 😉 but the mental game that goes with it). Here is me after my 200^th workout there!

• “Win the Day” – Starting a new habit or routine can be intimidating or daunting if you think too far in the future. I spent years putting off getting sober because I would get a few weeks under my belt and then those thoughts would creep in – “What? Am I never going to drink again? No beers with my kids on their 21^st birthday? No champagne toasts at their weddings? No wine on my trip to Italy I have been fantasizing about for 10 years?” These thoughts would creep in, and I would immediately throw in the towel – if it’s not forever then what’s the point anyway? These thought patterns occur for things like exercise routines, prioritizing nutrition, and anything else you can think of, really. If we think too much about anything, it can freak us out and make us run in the opposite direction. That’s where this quote and idea has really helped me. Just focus on the day. When I got sober, I definitely adopted the idea of “one day at a time” – it allowed me to just focus on not drinking that day and not thinking about the future. Then when I did 75Hard, the concept of “winning the day” took hold and I held on to this. I try to make a list (mental or physical) of things that I want to get done for the day and just focus on that. Not tomorrow, not next week, not next year. What do I want to do today and what I can do to make today a win? Eventually those “one day at a time” wins add up. For example, I opened up my sober app today and discovered I have been sober for 669 days. That is 669 days in a row that I have woken up and said “I’m not going to drink today.”

• “Strive to Get 1% Better Every Day” – If we have lofty goals like losing 100 pounds, we tend to visualize what life will be like when we reach our goal and forget about all the work we have to do to get there and what every day between now and then will feel like. We romanticize the future versions of ourselves, but don’t take the time to enjoy the small victories along the way. The concept of trying to get 1% better every day really resonated with me because it made me feel like every day was an accomplishment. If you can make small, microscopic improvements to yourself every single day, then those start compounding. You keep focusing on being a little better today than you were yesterday and soon you’ll wake up a year later and not even recognize the “you” that you were when you started. Up your weight by 2 pounds for one exercise today. Read an extra 5 pages today. Drink an extra 8 oz of water today. Walk an extra tenth of a mile today. Read one extra book with your kid at bedtime tonight. Kiss your spouse one more time today. All these small incremental changes add up over time. Start it today and you’ll be amazed where it takes you.

Podcasts I Enjoy:

• ‘Shots to the Dome’ by DLDNation: Self-help and overall wellness – broad variety of topics and guests – I learn something or have some kind of “ah-ha” moment with every episode. Highly recommend.
• ‘Oprah’s Super Soul’ by Oprah Winfrey: Self-help and overall wellness – Oprah’s interviews with thought-leaders, authors, health and wellness experts – wide variety of topics and always leaves me feeling inspired.
• ‘Give them Lala’ by Lala Kent: Just for fun – I am a huge “Vanderpump Rules” fan and Lala is one of my faves. Love her podcast when I feel like just listening to her talk/rant about some random shit. Always entertaining.
• ‘Giggly Squad’ by Hannah Berner & Paige DeSorbo: Just for fun – this is for when you’re craving that “girl time.” When I listen to this podcast, I feel like I am sitting around with my girlfriends just talking shit about life and laughing until we cry. Always find myself laughing out loud when I listen.
• ‘Sober Mom Life’ by Suzanne Warye: Sobriety – great one for any and all moms out there who are either sober or sober-curious and may want to take a deeper look at their relationship with alcohol. She interviews regular moms who made the decision to stop drinking. Some of these are so relatable they make me cry. Will help you feel seen, heard, and like you’re not alone if you’re in the “what is happening to me” mode.
• ‘Recovery Happy Hour’ by Tricia Lewis: Sobriety – shares stories of regular old people who stopped drinking and what their life looks like now. Very inspiring and relatable.
• ‘Seltzer Squad’ by Kate Zander & Jes Valentine: Sobriety – a couple young chicks who live in NYC and talk about navigating sober life in this environment. Entertaining and relatable.

Books that Made me Think and Inspired Change:

• ‘You are a Badass,’ et. al. by Jen Sincero: Basically obsessed with her and everything she does. Her book ‘You are a Badass’ was the first book I read when I decided I needed a change and it honestly did change my life. ‘You are a Badass at Making Money’ and ‘Badass Habits’ are also incredible, inspiring, and I highly, highly recommend all of her work to anyone and everyone.
• ‘The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck’ by Mark Manson: This one changed my life too. So many “OMG holy shit how have I never seen this?!” moments in this book for me. Title is somewhat misleading in that I think this book is more about helping you decide what is worth giving a fuck about and what isn’t worth your time or energy. Seriously incredible for putting things in perspective.
• ‘Untamed’ by Glennon Doyle: This is honestly just a collection of lessons, stories, and inspiration from a chick who has been through some shit. Trust me when I say it’s worth the read, especially for women.
• ‘This Naked Mind’ by Annie Grace: If you are even contemplating giving up or taking a break from alcohol or even just taking a closer look at your habits as they relate to alcohol – PLEASE stop what you’re doing and read this book. Honestly, it takes some time to get in to and isn’t the most exciting start, but please trust me and stick with it. This truly, truly changed my relationship with alcohol and helped me to see things in a completely different light than I ever thought possible. If you want things to stay exactly the way they are and you want to keep your head buried in the sand with your blinders fully on, this book is not for you. It will force you to see things differently.
• ‘Quit Like a Woman’ by Holly Whitaker: Fair warning – this one is fairly politically charged. However, it is also one of my favorites on the topic of sobriety. If you’re a woman even remotely interested in becoming sober, I recommend.

These items are in my personal toolkit, and they are all things that I can keep coming back to whenever I need inspiration, a reminder of why I am doing what I am doing, and just a general kick in the rear. I hope they help you or give you some inspiration for building your own toolkit!

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