I have always been a list maker. It began in high school when I started to get busy with dance and school and other extra-curricular activities.  I needed to start keeping track of what I was doing and when so things didn’t fall through the cracks. I actually have those school agendas to thank for starting me on this habit! Any other millennials out there remember those big agendas they would give us in the beginning of the year? I think most people threw theirs directly in the trash or in their box of crap under their bed but I used the HELL out of mine! I organized it and categorized it with different highlighter colors and gel pens. I covered it in pictures of me and my friends. It was almost like a creative expression for me now that I think back on it, but it also allowed me to plan when assignments were due, block out time for homework and projects based on when I knew I would be busy with activities outside of school and when I had free nights. I continued this habit into college as well, but had to buy my own planners by that time. #adulting

Once I started working, I stopped buying the actual planners because I could use my Blackberry (lol) and Outlook Calendar by that time. Still, I blocked my calendar and my schedule for things that were a priority and that I knew I needed to get done. This is still a huge work hack for me – anything I need to get done that’s not a huge priority or an actual meeting, I block time on my calendar to get it done, close my office door (or put my status on do not disturb now that I work remotely), and put my head down to knock it out. I also start a sticky note every morning and list out all the work things I need to get done that day before I “call it a day.” Disclaimer – 9 times out of 10 all the items on my fancy sticky note to-do list don’t actually get done because of whatever other fires I am dealing with during the day, but still the point is there and my habit of starting the sticky note remains! 😉

I was an avid list maker and scheduler in a school or professional setting because I am a people pleaser at heart and needed to ensure I was meeting all the expectations that people set for me. I wanted to get good grades and I wanted to be a good employee, so I did what I needed to do in order to excel at school and at work and make my teachers/professors/coworkers/bosses proud of me. I still do. Which is why it is so mind blowing that I never ever considered making lists or scheduling time for myself or the things outside of work or school that I want to get done for myself until very recently. It never even occurred to me. I tried to squeeze-in all the work stuff and mom stuff, and then whatever time was left in my day normally ended up just being filled with tv or social media scrolling because I hadn’t planned any differently and I didn’t know what goals I even had for myself. I was just trying to keep my head above water.

This all changed for me at the beginning of 2023 when Korey and I did the 75Hard program. I have written about our experience with 75Hard before, so I won’t go into too much detail here, but let’s just say it requires a lot of tasks to be completed daily. It came with an app you could download to check-off the required daily activities as you completed them throughout the day, and then confirm that you “won the day” at the end of every day once all your tasks were checked-off. The concept of a daily personal to-do list made perfect sense and it worked SO WELL for me that I couldn’t believe I hadn’t thought of it before!

After we were done with 75Hard, there was no reason to continue using the app because we were done with the program and not completing the same tasks every day. There were still things I wanted to continue doing and I wanted to get done every day, but my plan was just to continue doing them and keeping track of things in my head. Surely, I didn’t need to write anything down or track it in any meaningful way! I could just know that I wanted to meditate and hit 10,000 steps and drink a gallon of water and hit my macros and get a workout in and read 10 pages every day, right?!

You know what happened when I no longer had the 75Hard checklist to hold me accountable for the day? I started slipping on the things I wanted to get done. I would remember at dinner time that I forgot to meditate that morning and by then, it was too late. I needed to do it before the kids woke up for it to be meaningful for me. I would realize at bedtime that I only drank a half gallon of water that day and by then it was too late, I wasn’t going to chug another half-gallon of water before bed. I would check my Fitbit when I was changing into my PJs and realize in only hit 5k steps for the day because I forgot about the walk I was going to take. Things just gradually stopped happening and I started to blame myself. I started to wonder why I was able to accomplish so much more when I was doing 75Hard, but when my list of tasks is actually smaller, I wasn’t able to complete them. Was I weaker? Was I just not as motivated as I was during my 75Hard phase? Was I starting to get complacent?

Then it clicked – I had no method of keeping track of everything I wanted to do for myself outside of the running to-do list in my brain (which is never-ending by the way). Korey had experienced the same realization and we decided to start trying to keep track of the things we wanted to get done in some kind of meaningful way. I am sure there are all kinds of apps out there that will let you compile a to-do list of your own making, or you could even use the notes app in your phone every day, but we decided we wanted to track it on paper. We worked together to create our own list of tasks that were important to us to get done every day. We put them down on paper, and then we printed them out and put them in a binder, one for each of us. We literally keep the binders on the kitchen counter so that every time we walk by it we can check-off the things we complete or are reminded of what we still need to complete. 

This helps me plan my day because it’s a constant physical reminder. If I finish a meeting and go downstairs for a quick lunch, I see that and think “let me down half of my water bottle before I eat lunch.” Or “let me check my calendar and see when I can squeeze my walk in later today.” Then I block my calendar for the time I want to get my walk in and make it happen. Before I go to bed at night, I prep my list for the next day so that the fresh list for the day is the first thing I see when I walk out of my bedroom the next day. That reminds me to meditate before the kids wake up and allows me to start my day with the instant gratification of checking things off my list before I have even started working. Talk about an ego boost!

Now… is every day a win? Abso-fucking-lutely not. But I have a hell of a lot more wins than losses, and a hell of a lot more wins than I did before I started tracking it. The difference now is that when I have a day when I don’t get everything done, I am prepared for it and I know it’s happening. Sometimes it’s an active choice. It makes it a lot easier to cope with a loss if you’re actively accepting it and choosing it. Just this week I had one day of running lots of errands. I knew I wasn’t going to be home most of the day, between a few errands and appointments, capped-off by taking Fischer to football practice in the evening. I decided that I wasn’t going to force a gallon of water that day since I knew my access to a bathroom may be limited. I went to bed that night marking my day as a loss and being OKAY with it. I didn’t beat myself up. I didn’t call myself mean names. Making a list and tracking your progress during the day puts things in your control and lets you be in the driver seat. Regardless of whether it’s a win or a loss, being aware of it and feeling in control of it is huge.

What you add to your list is completely and totally your prerogative. All of us have different priorities. Some may be health and fitness related; some may be related to mental health; some may be related to whatever hobby you are in to. The other thing I highly recommend is adding a few spots for add-in tasks that won’t apply to every single day, but serve as reminders for specific things you may want to get done on a given day. I use these slots for things like “schedule Fowler’s flu shot appointment” or “write my weekly Shimmer & Shame article” (on my list today 😉) or “buy little Freddy a birthday present.” I just wake up in the morning and add in whatever specific tasks I want for the day in addition to my normal daily tasks (or do it the night before).

Here are the items on my personal daily checklist:

1. 10-minute meditation
2. Drink a gallon of water
3. Hit my macros for the day
4. Spend 30 minutes being active outside
5. Hit 10,000 steps for the day
6. Complete a workout
7. Read 10 pages of a non-fiction book

It seems like such a small thing, writing things in your head down on paper. It doesn’t seem like it could make that big of a difference. I am here to tell you that it has made a WORLD of difference for me. Just try it. What could it hurt?

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